A survivor’s journal was found in the year 2 A.C. (2 years After Covid). These snippets revel some of the best ways to get through any home based quarantine….
Cannaseur’s Log: Day 3 of The Covid-19 Quarantine
Five o’clock shadow is in effect. Wearing the same hoodie I wore on Day 1. Come to think of it I’m also wearing the same sweatpants. Just braved the grocery store. Made it out alive with an entire roll of toilet paper. The family has welcomed me home as a conquering hero. The authorities say the virus strikes the respiratory system so I must be careful. Common sense tells me it’s edible time.
Fruit Slabs Vegan Fruit Leathers ought to do the trick. Being that the zombie hordes already claimed all the fresh fruit from the produce aisle this is the next best thing. They come in OG Mango, Mango Wowie, Grandaddy Grape and Tropical Haze. I close my eyes and eat a couple 10mg slabs and make believe I’m back on the sandy shores of my beloved Costa Rica. Times were so much simpler then. Frolicking on the sand and eating tropical fruits straight off the trees. Will my feet ever feel the sand again? After a few of these slabs I’m not sure my feet will even touch the ground again.
Cannaseur’s Log: Day 7 of Quarantine
I’ve added another hoodie and pair of sweatpants into the rotation. Got the beginning of a beard going. Running out of Oreos. Some strong memes coming out of this pandemic. Somebody help me log off Facebook.
I decided to take a shower today and wear something nice to lift my spirits. My wife tells me I look like a turn of the century British banker. I told her it’s because I’m dipping into the medicated Tinley Beverages and I’m pouring them in my favorite sifter and so what if I’m wearing a monocle and yelling, “Cheerio!” at the passers bye. It’s called getting into character. “Pour me another Tinley High Horse!” I shouted! The neighbors are leering at me through their curtains. They know I’m high.
Cannaseur’s Log: Day 10 of Quarantine
All this social distancing has got me down. I figured if I had the virus it would have made itself known by now. Perhaps a good ol‘ fashioned toke is finally in order. Sampled some of 22Red‘s OG Indica and it’s almost as if I’m not living in some near apocalyptic world where the My Pillow guy is on the news dispensing virus tips and Clorox wipes are selling higher than crude oil.
Did I mention the sleep? I finally peeled myself from Twitter and slept like a baby. I should have hoarded some Caramel Gelato Hybrid Indica instead of all this toilet paper. What am I going to do with all this toilet paper. Which reminds me; I need more rolling paper.
Cannaseur’s Log: Day 14 of Quarantine
Two whole weeks. This beard is looking rad. Finished all my flower unfortunately. Luckily there are heroes in this community that will deliver more bud to your home. When this whole pandemic is over I’m putting their names in for the Congressional Medal of Honor.
Sampled some Cut & Dry Premium PLAY flower. Just the thing to take me out of my sweatpants and into some workout shorts. Gave me the courage and wherewithal to venture out into the hinterlands and explore the ruins at a respectable 6 feet from all who scavenge the land.
Turns out it was a beautiful day and the air was crisp from everyone leaving their cars and airplanes at home and the only thing really out of whack were the hordes of people in dental masks walking their dogs in figure eights around one another. I ran a solid 7 miles listening to the soothing melodies of the Oak Ridge Boys and basking in the high octane euphoria of this premium ganja. Made it home in time for my Zoom Room chat with family. The niece and nephews made the most darling medical masks. Mom asked if something was on fire in the background. I told her it was the indoor hibachi but everyone knows it was my cone joint.
Cannaseur’s Log: Day 20 of Quarantine
Almost three weeks has passed. I think. Time really has no meaning anymore. Looks like we’ll be hunkering down for an indefinite period. Thank god I have all this toilet paper. Feeling sore from another day’s run, and also a bit anxious from the whole viral Pandemic and millions out of work thing. Nothing a little Platinum CBD can‘t cure. Now kicking the feet up and taking some deep vape hits while watching Governor Cuomo give a power point presentation to the free world. That accent is something else. It’s amazing how my sofa has taken on the exact shape of my body. Now I know how Han Solo felt like when he was suspended in carbonite.
So this is what relaxation in the time of Covid looked like… and they said it couldn’t be done. But we did it!
