Some hemp, some hemp, my kingdom for some hemp…
Harriet is a horse lady. Not a centaur mind you, but a woman who loves horses. She dotes on her own horse whom she affectionately refers to as “Pony Girl.” She rides Pony Girl, she brushes Pony Girl, she fits Pony Girl with the finest made Italian horseshoes, and at night she reads Louis L’amour novels to Pony Girl as she falls asleep standing up in her sensibly decorated barn.
The sad truth is that Pony Girl is actually not a girl at all. She’s an old lady horse who has over time developed a hitch in her gallop. Much like Harriet herself. Two old biddies fighting against father time during the winter of their discontent. Then one day the stable boy, known for his hemp acumen, suggested Hemp Oil for Horses by Green Gorilla. Harriet, while a traditionalist, decided to listen to the young stable boy and had him apply a generous amount of this hemp oil to her beloved Pony Girl.
Before long those two grand dames were able to gallop together to that old cherry tree at the outer edges of the ranch. Harriet saw glimpses of the colt she once knew and Pony Girl was able to ride once more.
Animal Husbandry meets Agricultural Psychonautics