Solar Flare Cookies

Edible Northern Lights…

It took almost a week to hitch hike from San Diego to Juneau, Alaska. The solar flares were lining up to be spectacular this season, and the Moonman Mistress: Solar Flare cookies sealed safely away in my backpack, promised my viewing of the Aurora Borealis those sun flares created to be even better.

I jumped off the Big Rig into a small slushy dirt puddle just outside town, and gave my deepest thanks to Rick, my roughnecks chauffeur over the past 250 miles or so, as I pulled my backpack down from the seat. We’d bonded over listening to Willy, Johnny, and Hank. But things got a little awkward around politics and religion, and the last 100 miles had gotten a little quite.

The sun was setting as I walked across the bridge to Douglas Island. I pulled my mom-knit woolen scarf around my neck as an Autumn Alaskan chill set in. The clear evening sky was already teaming with stars, and whisps of sun-painted colors were popping across the arcing celestial plane. So I popped a Solar Flare edible of my own, saved for just this moment.

It was fully dark by the time I’d hiked away from the city lights and found what seemed to be the right clearing, on the right hill, right where I could finally stretch out on my sleeping bag unhindered… the cannabis cookies and the sky show were just beginning to peak perfectly together. I opened my eyes wide, and my mind wider, and let the dance of electrons from the solar-flared fingertips of the Sun mingle with Solar Flare medicinal magic in my bloodstream… allowing myself to be the vehicle through which the universe perceived itself as beautiful… and let it all go.

When I woke up the next morning, still blissed out with dreams of cotton rainbows and white shag rugs, I found myself cuddling a small sleeping albino Polar Bear at the grassy bottom of an off season ski slope. The box of emptied canna-cookies lodged between its sharp smiling teeth.

It was going to be an interesting journey home…

Probiotic Cannabis Chocolate

Gourmand ganja for the gut… Whoever knew that a delicious chocolate could do so much? Heal the psyche AND heal the gut? The good people at Oara, that’s who. Packed with beneficial bacteria and the ever so beneficial THC these chocolate thins are the decadent choice for total wellness. Since cultivating a dynamic and healthy […]

Better Bong Water

Give Piece a chance… A designer bong deserves designer water. Would you fill up the tank of your brand new Ferrari with Mountain Dew? Let the record show that you would not. Than why continue to fill up your beautiful, shimmering new water pipe with tap water? The same tap water you wash your hands […]

Chocolate Love

Special chocolates for a special love… Happy Valentines! Did you get chocolates from your loved one today? Show some real valentine love with one of The New Smoker’s curated selection of cannabis chocolates. What’s a better way to say I love you than getting super high on Valentine’s Day, and doing some seriously deep Netflix […]

Natura Hemp Rolling Papers

Naturally Natura… When Little Jimmy Fontaine finally went all natural everyone thought it was just a phase. It started innocently enough. He started buying organic fruits and vegetables and relied only on Rizla’s Natura responsibly sourced hemp rolling papers to smoke his homegrown bud. Before long, he went vegetarian and then vegan and then raw vegan and then […]

Marble Pipes

Secret society’s pipe of choice… The Grand Puba of the Eternal Sativa Lodge has called upon the almighty seer stone to be brought forth with. As the central ritual piece of the Treemason’s harvest ceremony this marble pipe also acts as conduit to the spirit world. Designed by Fredericks & Mae this cone shaped pipe […]


Into the vape wide open… Dateline: Kathmandu. 4,600 feet above sea level. 27°42′41″N 85°18′31″E. The young Nordic explorer, Thor Ganjarohl has returned triumphant from his record solo of Mt. Everest. The Nepalese know it as Sagarmāthā. With wind chills in excess of -70C, young Thor not only survived but thrived. He attributes his Thrive Vape Pen from […]

The Peak

The pinnacle of highness… Take your preferred concentrate and embark on a journey up the north face of Mt. Cannabis. A rarefied air for dab lovers who are always looking for higher peaks. Puff Co. has created a sleek vaporizer to vanquish your concentrate and put you on the summit of Where-the-hell-am-I-ville. Part light show, […]

Cannatonic Tonic

A sublime sublingual… It’s three o’clock in the morning and you’ve tuned into Tincture Radio, playing all those edible delights for you on your graveyard shift. We’ve got a special request going out to all those sublingual freaks out there. A cool and mellow high is coming your way from the groovy cats over at […]

Guild Extracts

Extraction traction… – THE STATE OF THE GUILD ADDRESS – “Here! Here! The Guild of Extracts has taken to the floor. The Honorable Bud McVaporstein has the microphone.” “Thank you, thank you. I will start by saying the state of Guild Extracts is strong and we continue to pick up steam. Our extracts have exceeded […]

Load more